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Twice as good

Fireflies & Songs

From the Album Fireflies & Songs by Sara Groves

when I am down and need to cry till morning
I know just where I am going
when I’m in need of sweet commiseration
to speak out loud

raise a glass to friendship and to knowing
you don’t have to go alone
we’ll raise our hearts to share each others burdens
on this road

with every burden I have carried
with every joy it’s understood
life with you is half as hard
and twice as good

with my good news your dancing on the table
babies born to celebration
the joy of life oh what a sweet communion
shared with you

I know we’re growing older
can you imagine what that will bring
it’s all a mystery to me now
but this one thing

it will be half as hard, and twice as good

(Click on the album credit to listen to the song)

This song has had me in tears and smiling from ear to ear all at once for well over a decade. It’s a testament to the good we cultivate in the hard of life through our relationships. No matter where we have lived, or how hard life has been, there have always been people in our lives who contributed to the truth of this song. Their presence and relationship has made life “half as hard and twice as good”.

This year, I began to feel that my relationship circles have shifted over time and in need of some tending. I’ve learned to acknowledge that this happens as life unfolds, people move or our seasons of life change. Things simply don’t stay the same as our stories unfold. This is both the joy and the sorrow of life. Right now, I am feeling the need to show up more often for others and for myself. To be present in a world that feels distracted and disconnected to ourselves, to others, to living out lives of meaning.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to flourish in our modern world. What makes meaningful connection and purpose possible? What do we need right now more than anything?

In pursuit of some insight, I have been writing, reading, listening to podcasts, talking with friends and artfully playing with the concept (note the sketchbook doodle above). My journals and notebooks now have a long list of ideas and notes from a wide array of authors and leading thinkers on the subject. Though, I don’t think I found a complete answer to the question yet, I am more convinced than ever about this: We need creativity and real life connection to flourish.

If you are feeling this lack of flourishing in your life right now, I want to encourage you to seek out others. Find a person or a community that can come along side you, in creative ways, to help make life “half as hard and twice as good”.

This month, I am doing just that through my community arts non-profit, New Joy Arts. My good friend (and fellow artist) Judith Monroe and I are reaching out to gather people together to talk about some of the things I have learned about brain science and relational connection with others, to have some snacks and explore some creative expression to help us flourish. If you are local and want to join us, I’m inviting you!

Here’s the details for our upcoming Flourish Gathering.

We have been talking about doing this in person for awhile. As we’ve shared, we discovered that some of our farther flung circles of friends would also like to participate in gathering online. If that’s you, let me know and consider signing up for the New Joy Arts updates so you can get the details when it comes together.

I’d love to hear from you about what makes flourishing possible in your life. What relationships, practices or priorities have brought you the kind of good that Sara Groves sings about? What has made your life “half as hard and twice as good”?

Please share with me in the comments of this post.

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Enough

Too many, too much – Too little, not enough.

As a regular practice, I journal and reflect on what is going on in my life. It’s been an essential exercise for me creatively and spiritually to get perspective on what’s going on both inside and around me. Working to put jumbled thoughts and feelings on the page helps me see with a clarity that I otherwise struggle to find. Though I haven’t often written here, I have been filling my journals for years as I sought out the insight I needed for creating an artful life of meaning and purpose. Mostly, I thought this practice was just for my own good but the more I share excerpts with others, I discover that it is worth more than that.

Welcome to my writing desk as I open up the pages of my creative life journey to share with you.

This week, as I sat down with some time to reflect on the cusp of a family vacation and a new season of life laying ahead that I need to navigate when we return to start a new school year. With pen ready for the page, all I could feel was lack… Lack over what I haven’t done thus far in life, what I haven’t managed to sustain or even finish at home, at work or in my creative life. Facing the next transition in life with this lens of lack in place, there was a lot of ‘too little and not enough’ to find.

Discouraged, I started to make myself a personal timeline to re-tell myself the story of my life. I looked again, further back into all the seasons I am leaving behind, and I began to see more clearly what made up my days and years. I could see with a new gaze why sustaining and building things in my career or creative life has been so hard. My hands and my days were full already.

I have spent the past 20+ years raising kids, running a home, teaching my children, moving across the country, sharing the gift of art with my community wherever we landed and trying to find my own voice in the midst of it all. Looking back I can say with grace and wonder, “Wow! My plate was always full.” Life was overflowing with too much; too many things to do, too many shifts to navigate, too many options on the table. It’s amazing that I managed to get anything done at all!

The lens of reflection significantly changes what we see. At the start, I was looking back at my life for some sort of career and artistic legacy through the perspective of institutional accomplishment, achievement and acclaim to decide what’s next. That limited lens framed the questions that I asked myself and the answers of lack that I found. The practice of changing my lens to the perspective of a full, integrated and creative life allowed me to see an overflow. Now I can see a creative life and a career that has navigated the whole of who I am: a wife, a mother, a teacher and an artist.

In this new season, I can ask questions and find answers that frame the whole of the life I have made which is not lacking but bursting at the seams. I have a long, rich life of pressing into creativity as a practice. I have a storehouse of collections, creations and discoveries to share. As I look back and I look ahead, I am beginning again here with you, to give thanks for the unfinished and to take stock of the good that is there. It is more than enough for whatever lays ahead in this next season and I want to share.

What good do you have to share with the world? What has your full life gifted to you?

I would love to have you share your storehouse with me, too.

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A Season of Waiting

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The season of Advent is one of waiting… of preparation, of anticipation… and, if we are honest, often a season of weariness. This year, a theme that keeps hitting my ears has been ‘reality Christmas’.  This concept acknowledges the drain and strain that the endless activities of the holidays can produce.  Family gatherings, growing to-do lists and endless events can do more to grow loneliness & despair than the hope & peace written on every Christmas card we write.  It pushes against the magical ideal of a picture perfect Christmas and embraces the heartache and disappointment that real life often brings.

Many of us want to create & celebrate the wonder of the holidays for our families as well as ourselves.  We long to have the perfect moment, the rich traditions and deep meanings of this season be our reality.  However, it can be a challenge to come even close to the desire we have… Life get’s messy. So do we give up the hope? Do we become less wishful? Do we simply lower our expectations?  Or is there another way?

Advent is the four weeks or Sundays preceding Christmas. It is the beginning of the church calendar and a season of looking ahead to the year to come.  We remember the promises of the prophets, marvel with Mary, Journey with Joseph, wonder with the shepherds, and then rejoice with the angels when Christ is born. It’s a miraculous story but it is not short and sweet. It’s a slow, unfolding story that took generations to be fulfilled. It’s a baby that takes months to develop. It’s a journey that takes miles to travel. It’s a precious gift that comes to us from the far reaches of the earth. It’s a kingdom that takes generations to establish.

It is in this vein that we approach Christmas. It is slow and plodding.  Mundane and tedious, surprising and unfolding. It is both magical and very much real.  It is a mystery.

We should give ourselves grace for the full range of life and not feel we need to rush to make happen what will unfold.  We are waiting for what has been promised and has yet to come.

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Eternity in this moment

  Life is fleeting.  Time flies.  Moments pass in the blink of an eye.   That’s what they say… and to a degree, it is true.  We do not get to pause our lives, relive our pasts or guarantee our futures. We only hold each moment we are presented with.  

That is the beauty. The mystery. As creatures of time we have been designed to hold this moment, right now, while we also hold our memories of the past & our hopes for the future in the very same hands.  Somehow, through this mystery of trifold time, we can grasp eternity. 

Does this call to something deep within you? A longing? A hope?

I believe this mystery is the grand story God has written in the stars, whispers in the wind, echoes through the mountains & calls to us in the face of a newborn babe.  A longing for wholeness.  A desire for our past, present & future to find a home. He created us with eternity in our hearts.

This Christmas season I have been struck with this concept anew. Meditating on John 1 I have been in awe of the God of eternity who has woven his love throughout history to invade time in a specific moment, place, person & point towards the hope of the future all at once.  In a dynamic convergence, one moment radically transforms all three strands of time at once. The God of Eternity, who created time itself, has become one with His creation. 

This is John’s statement about the birth of Jesus.  

“In the beginning the Word already existed.  He was with God and He was God.  He created everything there is.  Nothing exists that he didn’t make. Life itself was in Him and this life gives light to everyone. The light shines through the darkness and the darkness can never extinguish it. The one who is the true light, who gives light to everyone, was going to come into the world. So the Word became human and lived here on earth among us.”  John 1:1-5, 9, 14 (NLT)

Can you see the mystery that has struck me so deeply? Through the stretch of eternity we can hear God’s words from Genesis 1 “Let there be light” echo from the beginning of time itsel through John’s account of Jesus coming & into the unknown of the future where the light can not ever be extinguished. What power, what mystery, what hope.

It is easy to feel like our past is a mess. We often look ahead with fear or uncertainty towards our future.  Today can feel insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Yet, when I consider my life & journey in light of John’s view of eternity I am convinced that each moment matters. That each moment is held together with the strands of eternity I can not always see.  

Years ago, I was struck for the first time by the eternal aspect of our prayers to God. The story of Zechariah & Elizabeth in Luke’s account of Jesus’ coming taught me to see this.  They prayed, pleaded with God for a child.  Years went by.  No child. Then one day in the temple Zechariah is told “Now is the time, your prayers have been answered.” Just like Abraham & Sarah centuries before, God was providing a miraculous child in their old age.  God heard their prayers & answered them in light of eternity. He spoke his “yes”at just the right time. The time that was perfect for the kingdom of heaven. 

I don’t think Elizabeth thought. God was going to say yes.  It was too late.  She asked & time passed so it must have been a “no”. But her prayer was not lost in the cosmos.  It had not gone unanswered.  It just needs to fit into all 3 strands of time. God wove together His past promises, their present longings & our future hope when He answered their prayer. 

Our prayers & our lives are no different.

Paul writes to the early believers that “we know God causes everything to work together. For the good of those love God & are called according to their purpose for them.” Romans 8:28 (NLT)

We are called to live lives of purpose.  Each moment that we we live is woven into the fabric of eternity.  Our pasts & our futures have a home in the present eternity we hold right now. For me, that perspective transforms how I view my life.  It helps me find the focus to choose my next steps & fills with me with hope.  I am anchored in eternity & the God who holds me in his hands is working for good in all the strands of my life.  That is joy for the journey whatever lies ahead. 

 

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This Life

imageHow do you see your life? Do you sit & wonder about how you ended up here?  Do you stare ahead into the uknown with dread? Do you turn toward the memories to escape the present? Do you fix your eyes on today just to make it through?

These can be hard questions for us to ask ourselves. Even more challenging to ask them to one another. They touch so deeply in the heart that we often push the questions away, afraid of what they may stir up within us. Why are we afraid of asking, looking and answering the deep questions of our souls?

Fear & failure. They are bullies that push us around on the playground of life. We listen to them & we allow their taunts to keep us from living in hope & freedom.  Their voices are so loud, their words hit so close to our insecurities, their strikes hurt when they find a place to land. So they have control over us when we live in the shaddows of their power.

My life has not gone the way I thought it would. I have faced the dissapointment & fear of surveying my life as the shaddows of my dreams have drifted across the strange landscape I live in. I have struggled to live in the place that my heart longs to dwell. It has been a challenge not to give up hope when the bullies wander near. This place can keep me a prisoner if I don’t listen to the voices of others calling me out of this place of uncertainty.

Can I be that voice for you? I want to invite you to a safe place. A lush green field where there are no bullies. A place where you are welcome to ask, reflect and speak truthfully. A flat, firm & secure place from wich you can survey your life. Come to my Father’s land with me. This is where we can go, just as we are, to find the hope we long for & gain the strength we need to defend against the bullies. This is where we can come together to find a new view, dream new dreams & honestly face the journey of life with joy.

It’s been a long time since I have written here but I am convinced that we all need good company as we walk the roads before us. So, I am comitting to write about this life of discovery. Will you come with me as I go again & again to this land of my Father in search of joy for this morning?